Ronald McDonald and McDonald’s

After Ole Stalin died and Godfrey ran away with the money, Ronald McDonald stepped in to make the kiddies happy. Quickly, his business of selling fast foods to those shivering poor saps during the winters grew and people were getting food. Eventually, at the company’s peak of success, the fat kids from eating too much were killed and set alight to make fires for the cold slavs. This was made possible by all the fats and oils consumed by eating McDonald's and now they could also cook food with these fires. Another great thing they did was cook the corpses and tenderise the meat for dinners.

The company soon expanded to America and had branches there in the States in five years. Ronald McDonald himself would commonly earn the ire of the American Capitalists for being from a Communist nation, something that impacted the company's early business. As the Yankees found the superiority that was McDonald's compared to Chuck E. Cheese, Taco Bell and others, they erected Ronald McDonald statues outside each restaurant.